Different kind of yous

There's conceptually different kind of yous

Mind self

The self that you think you are (your idea of yourself, your identity)

Manifested self

The self that you manifest in the world (your actions, your experiences, your decisions)

Perceived self

The self that is perceived from you by the world (the sensory information you give that is processed by other beings)

You can control the first two, entirely. The more honest you navigate the first two realms, the more peaceful you will be with yourself, and the more transparent your perceived self will be to people.

The perceived self is not entirely in your control. You can't switch, change, evolve or improve the way people perceive you because their senses and selves are biased by the way they conduct their own mind self and manifested self. Yet, it's not a good idea to ignore entirely the feedback mechanism you get from the world.

Let's put it this way.

The mind-self is the idea you have about you, about who you are, your identity. The mind-self evolves and is shaped by your manifested-self. Your manifested-self, which means your actions, your decisions, your courage, changes your identity and the idea you have about yourself. The mind-self and the manifested-self are in constant evolution, changing each other.

Your perceived self is the feedback you get from the world around you. You shouldn't ignore this feedback, and you can make use of it to explore and maybe detect some blind spots.  Nonetheless, you should not base your mind self on it, because it's simply not accurate.

It's tricky to navigate the three realms, yet it is absolutely necessary to do it, creating this awareness of who we are is the best investment we can do with our time. It will naturally bring the best versions of ourselves.